Every man believes and insists that he’s different than other men. When he discovers he’s not, he simply blames a woman for his bad behavior, because she’s a bitch. — A.A. Jones
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In order to have a successful Union you need collaborative spirit amongst the women. Can women work with each other and fight for their rights? Sadly, I have never experienced a collaborative spirit in the strip club. It is a highly competitive profession although it shouldn’t be like this. But it just is. The bitches are jealous and for every girl that leaves two new ones line up.
I remember the one night when the new law had already taken effect, and we were suppose to do the first 4 lap dances on the house to provide for our own minimum wage, the house fee and another fat cut for the house. We dancers agreed not to do any private dances that night. We agreed not to hustle and just do stage dances. That night, some of the less skillful dancers who aren’t that good at hustling took their chance and hustled their asses off to get the dances the professional strippers would’ve gotten if we would’ve not decided to sabotage the private dances due to the club taking 70% of our money. Some of the girls did 21 dances and were celebrated by management. And the ones that didn’t hustle went empty handed and revised their decision and now everybody is working harder than ever. When it comes to recognition and money people don’t work together. Instead, they work against each other. The corporate world is not much different. There was no union, no loyalty, no sticking to your word. It’s difficult.
Unionizing would also mean that even more dancers would lose their job. Who wants to pay for a stripper’s health care and benefits? Who wants to open up the possibility to a stripper to sue a customer when he assaults her. Assault comes with the job. Can you regulate a profession that builds on dealing with the sick and fucked up people. The reason why people visit the strip Club is because they feel accepted no matter what. It would be like a therapist asking their clients to censor their feelings and thoughts. And expressing inappropriate thoughts would lead to punishment. It just doesn’t work like that. What would be the point going to the strip club when you have to be afraid to show who you truly are? That’s the whole point for regular strip club goers who understand what service we provide and that we need to be appropriately paid for accepting them for who they are. It doesn’t mean every customer is a fit for me or I am a fit for them. But that’s why there’s many girls so we too can walk away.
But these are just a few reasons why I believe unionizing strippers won’t work.
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Stripping is a glamorous yet dirty profession. Glamorous because you will be admired and get your moments to shine. Dirty because there’s no protection for the woman inside the stripper. — A.A. Jones
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While the bouncer was asleep
I wanted to wheep
Because a customer slapped my ass, what a creep
While the bouncer took a shit
A customer groped my tit
Without even leaving a tip
In comes the popo
Looking for blow blow
Don’t pretend you’re a thug
I can’t help you find drugs
Into the lap dance booth we go
Where they think they can treat me like a cheap ho
“It’s OK to grind on my boner
I am really good friends with the strip club owner
I can touch you all I can
Because the manager knows I am the man”
I think to myself what a sham
Everybody is full of shit
I wish I could just quit
Instead I have to pay the bouncer a ten percent tip
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You grab my boobs with your rough bear paws
That’s on you, that’s your flaw
I can’t let this bring me down
To me you’re just a stupid clown
I don’t feel a thing
Not even the slightest ping
It’s not making me feel less
Just reveals your disgusting mess
The shame’s on you
But you’re so drunk you have no clue
You think it makes you a strong man
Trying to pin my hands behind my back
I can see in your heart all you lack
A man with no power
Trying to violate me, your stripper, to make me feel lower
But I don’t feel a thing
Not even the slightest ping
You slap my ass on stage
You should be put away in a tiny cage
Entitlement ruins the world
People like you contaminate the planet with their piles of turd
Not much I can do
Just protecting myself from people like you
But you won’t make me feel blue
I don’t feel a thing
Not even the slightest ping
You cuss me out with dirty words
Trust me none of this hurts
You can try all you want
Call me a dirty cunt
Stare down my vagina like you own her
But you’re just a primitive man who cannot care
I don’t feel a thing
Not the slightest ping
I brush you off
Because I grew quickly tough
People like you made me who I am today
So happy I met so many idiots, hooray
Thank you for turning my heart black
That’s why I am so strong
Without any drugs. I don’t need a bong
All I do is go home
Count my cash
You gave me a nice stash
Planning my trip to buy some food
For my precious brood
My children with four legs
That’s when I come alive
This is where I thrive
This is where I belong
And the rest just made me strong
So I can have the strength
And go to every length
To save just one more
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Yes, I have been violated, treated badly, and disrespected while dancing. But I have had also many wonderful experiences as an exotic dancer. I guess it’s like in every profession. The Harvey Weinsteins are praying on you, except that when you get violated as an exotic dancers it’s your own fault because you choose this profession and you’re asking for it wearing skimpy clothes and walking around in sexy lingerie. If I would take my sexual assaulters to court society would laugh at me. But if Angelina Jolie takes her violator to court the world is appalled. The world differentiates between regular women and strippers. So if anything bad happens to a stripper it’s her own fault. Meanwhile, we are all just women trying to make a buck, trying to feed our kids, helping our families to live better lives, pay our way through college … But society doesn’t see it that way. My passion is to make people understand that dancers are very sensitive human beings, sometimes, even more sensitive than “regular women.” We have feeling too. Yet, in order to survive in this profession, we have to be tough enough to brush it off and continue to dance …
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If you are a woman, if you have a vagina, chances are that you have or will be assaulted by a man at some point in your life. Most of the time your abuser will be a man you know, possibly even very well. The media has uncovered that women from all walks of life are affected and more women are coming out daily, more schmucks are being fired, more men exposed.
As a stripper sexual assault is part of your job environment, in fact, society expects you to take the hit and shut up and go about your life as if this is what you deserve. It goes even further. If people who do not know that you dance for living find out that you work in adult entertaining the relationship with them will change. My relationship with a male yoga student will change very quickly if he happens to find out that I am a stripper. I have been asked after my secret profession was exposed if it was OK to kiss — I am their fitness instructor! Co-workers have text me inappropriate late night messages, and doctors have started to make sexual remarks as well as telling me details about their sexually non-cooperative wives while I was on their treatment table. Male behavior will suddenly change once they have a stripper in front of them. Female behavior changes too, but today I just choose to hit the guys. Men feel a deep connection to you once they know you are a sex worker. They think you understand them better and therefore they also feel you’re responsible for their lack of sexual fulfillment, especially if their wife or girlfriend isn’t game. They feel you owe them the release, they also think since you deal with men in the club on a “sexual” level, which in my opinion is incorrect because it is rather a “sensual” level than a “sexual” encounter, you should take care of their sexual urges as well. Nobody understands though that stripping is a profession. And when I am not at work I don’t want to work, similar to a mortician. When he’s not at work he’s not going to wash a corps’ ass and apply makeup to their dead face unless in a specific environment where he’s going to be paid for his work.
I have been asked by men and women many times, after it was revealed that I am a stripper, to do a lap dance for them outside of the club. They claimed that they preferred a well lid environment, or they didn’t like the atmosphere in strip clubs, or they preferred a free lap dance outside of the club, or they wanted me to prove to them that I like them so much that they are worthy of a free lap dance. Would they ever ask their doctor to make a free house visit, their dog walker to walk their dog for free, or their maid to clean the house for free to prove her love for their family?
While we cannot prevent or eliminate the fact that women will always be victims of dicks, we cannot allow these assaults to affect or compromise our lives negatively. We cannot give our assaulter that much power. But we also cannot let them get away with it. We owe it to all the women out there to expose them and make them feel the consequences of their violations. We also need to learn — and I mean this in a positive way — to never at any circumstances let your stripper shield down. Wear it at work inside the club, but take it with you when you leave. Never strip down completely. Your stripper shield stays on!
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While I have many times addressed the male abuser that lives in every man, I have rarely spoken about the female demon that lives in every woman. Women are prone to mental hysteria. They talk themselves easily into a frenzy, and one wrong turn can get her to list every mistake you made over the past thirty years. There’s an abuser, assaulter, rapist in every man, and a lunatic in every woman.
Only self-awareness, discipline, and self-control — which includes the willingness to learn tools that help you control your demon — will help you become an evolved human being. While both, men and women, do not mean any harm, they must get to know their demons. Living in denial thinking clumsy gropes happen accidentally and raging rants are changing the other person and are suppose to do good — while they only cause damage — are not an effective way to deal with the un-evolved demon inside you. Get help. Demons damage others, but they also self-destruct.
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Did you know that there’s a special slush fund set up so women can be reimbursed and kept quiet when a congress man assaults her?! I wonder what is wrong with society? Having a fund for this kind of behavior makes it legitimate as well as protecting the congress men from any sort of punishment for sexual assault. Well, the tax payer is punished, because we pay for his lose dick, yet, he doesn’t even have to reach into his already fat pocket to at least feel a little ping for his unacceptable behavior. As long as funds like this exist sexual assault will always be accepted and part of regular social behavior and the Trumps, Lauers, Weinsteins, and Afflecks will be able to justify their clumsy gropes and falling into women’s panties by complete accident.
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Tilt: Diary of a Virgin Stripper 