PRACTICING BETTER HABITS AND CREATING NEW PATTERNS IN THE STRIP CLUB

Many strip club customers desire to relive their dating and relationship habits and kinks during their strip club visits. Sometimes, they want and try to reenact their current relationship dysfunctions, dilemmas, or patterns. It appears many people are addicted to their old dramas and patterns and try to take them into the strip club instead of trying to create something new and positive. It seems to be not easy to leave the old, known, painful scenarios behind, even though, the strip club offers the perfect set up to practice better ways. 

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PAVING THE ROAD FOR THE HONEST STRIPPER

There are good an bad apples in every profession, and the profession of the stripper does not present an exception. While I do believe that every girl is convinced she’s fair, “doing the right thing,” and treats her customers the way they deserve to be treated, abuse is a two way street. And some dancers seem to abuse their powers, seem to force customers into doing more dances than they want to do, or force them to do double dances when they don’t want to, even hold a monopoly on their customers, and manipulate, trick, and abuse their customers.
However, I always try to treat customers the way I wish I would be treated if I were a strip club customer. It has happened to me more than once that a man noticed my politeness, honestly, and the way I treat customers with respect. And this has paid off by them being very generous and showing their appreciation for how I work.

Sometimes, with the right customer, the manipulating, greedy girl paves the road for the genuinely caring and honest stripper. It feels good when people appreciate you and see your intention to do good.

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THE CHOSEN STRIPPER NAME

Till today, after a decade of stripping, I still do not understand and cannot wrap my brain around the fact that men think they would benefit from finding out a dancer’s “real” name, when she had no power of what her parents chose for her name and all the power to choose her own name. But men still think knowing your “real” name inches them into your vagina, possibly even into your heart, while just the question, “What is your real name?” is a complete turn off, not to mention it’s not even a big deal at all to tell them my given name. I doubt anybody would dare to ask any comedian, singer, dancer, actor to reveal their “real” name while in those professions it’s cool and well respected to have a stage name, but in our profession our stage name is looked down upon. Yet, often even the worst stripper is a better entertainer than most of those new, upcoming performers.

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STRIP CLUB FAKER

When she stepped on stage and started her shenanigans he asked me innocently, “Oh, is she trying to learn to dance, is she new?” I answered annoyed, “No! She’s here for a long time, she just can’t dance … but it’s her gimmick to cover up her lack of talent with the innocent, shy, new girl scheme. Honestly, I am totally annoyed by her, but the guys love it and buy into it. 🙄🙄🙄🙄” Some girls fake it till they make it, some never make it and just fake their way around it. 

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THE MYSTERY OF THE LAP DANCE CONTINUES

He just couldn’t wrap his head around it, “What do you mean? If I understand it right then there’s no sexual act performed in the lap dances!? What do you mean when you say you knew he was looking for something? What’s there to look for?” Many people cannot wrap their head around the mystery of the lap dance. I tried to explain, “It’s like an invisible cord for true connection and intimacy that we can plant during the lap dance. Most people don’t even know this type of connection can exist between two humans. But once you experience it you can go out and try to feel and live it. Once this invisible cord is laid it’ll always be there. Like an electrical cord … Then you just have to start sending electricity through it. First, it might be just little sparks and glimpses of it, but eventually, with practice, these men (sometimes women) learn to be the catalyst of true intimacy and connection with their partner. But very few understand that this is what they can learn from a good old stripper.” 

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STRIPPER’S SECRET ADDICTION

Raspberry madness … Fresh, organic antioxidants. Can’t get enough …

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A DECADE IN STRIP CLUBS LIVING ON THE EDGE

After nearly working for a decade in strip clubs I can honestly say that I have not been able to understand all the lessons, challenges, and experiences that I have been thrown into. Some make sense, others don’t at all, or maybe they don’t make sense yet. Once more, I can say the club as its own microcosm reflect life and possibly the entire universe. Some things appear to be guided by higher powers, other things seem to fall into the category “shit just happens.” And yet, while it gets easier to live and dance — because you get tougher, develop a higher tolerance for bullshit and pain, and learn to take things less and less personal or serious — it doesn’t get more fulfilling nor things flow more effortlessly. Maybe, because you think deeper as you mature, or maybe because it’s my nature to over-think the experiences I cannot make sense of. I wouldn’t say that experience is always a benefit … it is a give and take. You get smarter and safer — or at least you trick yourself into believing it — yet, you let go of your innocence, you lose the adventurous side that made things so exciting, and you lose hope that something big will happen that will positively make your life more worthy. Yet, in the end, it seems nothing significant has really changed or happened, nothing at least on the outside, because you keep dancing and you keep living. As a dancer, stripper, exotic dancer, sexworker you always live life on the edge of complete pessimism and absolut optimism. You have to. The pessimism keeps you safe, and the optimizm makes you survive and look at the most disappointing human encounters as an important lesson you just cannot understand but hope you’ll understand before you die. 

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