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She was visiting the club on her off night with a friend, and she was a little tipsy. A young girl in her early twenties with not much stage experience. I could see she had collected all of her courage to talk to me as she told me in a very thick Middle Eastern accent, “You know, I started dancing at this club to raise money for the short film I am producing. But I have to tell you, I will never forgot my first night here when I was auditioning and frightened by my performance anxiety, and you talked to me in the dressing room. I don’t know if you remember that night. Of course I remember that night, how could I forget, I remember the exact words of encouragement I told her when she had asked me how you dance sexy. But she repeated my words, “You told me, ‘Go out there and be you. Don’t imitate anybody, don’t try to pretend anything, the most enticing thing in a woman is who she really is deep down inside when she leaves her fears and inhibitions behind even if she’s shy about it. Shyness has it’s very own magnetic charm.’ You changed my life with your loving support, and I want you to know I have written you into my movie, you have a character.” Inspiring people means breathing courage and passion into their souls … now that is a rewarding experience.
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Like on so many nights, we were sitting at the bar scanning the room for potential customers. I leaned in and confessed to Abby, “I would rather go and do a private dance for any of these guys than have a conversation with them.” Abby answered not even flinching, “I totally understand what you mean.” And we continued to stare into the empty rather than trying to start up a conversation with any of these dudes. I know it doesn’t seem to make sense to any regular mortal but conversations take it out on you with these energy sucking humans. At least, when you dance you can enjoy yourself and get all into it, but when you have to listen to boring subjects without earning anything back from it — often not even an energetic payoff, when you have to pull each word out of a guys nose, when they tell you the same shit over and over again, when they just come to talk … sometimes, it gets so boring you want to commit suicide. We are suppose to be dancers, strippers who get you turned on … we are not suppose to be your conversational garbage can you often even take a dump into.
Therefore, Abby and I chose to stay seated and not put any effort into a conversation with any of these customers. After all, we sell lap dances, and if a guy wants one he can walk up to you and beg for one.
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Every girl at the club who stays there for a longer period of time develops her own routine. Some are always late and not ready on the floor by 10 p.m. or even 11 p.m. Some wear the same outfit over and over. Some stretch and practice pole tricks when it’s slow (especially at the beginning of the shift), others don’t come out of the dressing room till the club gets really busy. You get to know each girl’s little kinks and routines.
However, when a new DJ is hired it all changes. Girl who are chronically late show up on time or even early. Girls who never wear makeup are all of a sudden all dolled up. The girls that never stretch before the stage show begins are suddenly stretching like they are preparing for a track meet show. The new outfits and shoes sparkle, and it almost seems there’s a competition on who get the new man in the house first. This type of desperation in women doesn’t make me like my own kind. I wonder what it is? And in their defense while a new DJ can bring fresh wind to an old club it shouldn’t be them courting the new guy … Seems their all beguiled …
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Once more, the club has taught me a skill that seems to be lifesaving for any life situation: Eagle Perspective! Instead of letting outrageous behavior, rudeness, or negative energy suck me in, I stand back and watch from above. Being able to quietly observe without reacting immediately makes a big difference. Anger makes you blind. But when you’re forced to emotionally detach — which is crucial for club survival — and look at things rather analytically it gets very interesting. Humans’ outrageous behavior can be fascinating. It’s a freak show in itself. Whether you observe strip club customers, drivers on the 101 or 405, whether you see that DJ or your bullying boss trying to gain power of something minuscule, your neighbor over-water his already friend lawn, or your co-worker/co-stripper trying to sabotage you because of their lack of confidence. Start watching and you will be in for a mind blowing shit show …
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On many nights, it actually seems impossible to make money dancing for dollars. But once more the strip club proves that miracles do happen and can occur without even expecting the. Most of the times, although against all odds, it always does work out somehow. And what seems impossible at the beginning of the shift turns out to be a magical miracle at the end of it. Thank the Lord for listening to everybody’s prayers.
Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20
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