7) Before COVID-19 how often did you visit the strip club?

It has been several years since I revisited a strip club after 19 years, so I’ve been through many phases. The most I’ve ever gone is 3 times a week. The vast majority of the time, I go once a week. Honestly, I still am self-conscious about going to a strip club. I almost always go alone, and I know many of the dancers and much of the staff. I don’t want to be perceived as the pathetic old man at the strip club who doesn’t have anywhere else to go. While knowing everyone at the club has its benefits, I often crave to just be anonymous. Immediately before COVID-19, I had not gone in about six weeks.


8) Do you have a favorite club or do you shop around?

At this point, I’ve been to many strip clubs. However, where I live, I tend to frequent just one. The same one I went to when I was 21. The reasons are really quite simple. I literally live less than a mile from it. Also, the strip club has a bar in a room off to the side of the stages. There are no stages in that bar and it really looks like any other bar around town. I almost never go to the room with the dance stages. I sit at the bar almost all night. It is really just like my personal “Cheers.” Now, the advantage of that bar is that when the strippers are done dancing on their stages, they come out to that bar and drink. That is where one gets the opportunity to really talk to them. Finally, one of the staff there gave me a VIP card, so I get nice discounts.


9) Do you have a favorite dancer you prefer to see or do you spread the love?

I have befriended many of the dancers (which doesn’t mean I don’t lust after them). The ones that I have befriended I have befriended for a reason, which is that we have shared many personal stories about our lives, struggles, and dreams. These are the girls I prefer to see.


10) You say you enjoy helping strippers and you give them money even without getting a dance. Why is that? And what do you seek in return (conversation, admiration, counseling …) ?

This is one I’m still working through. Part of it is that I definitely like taking care of people and who better to take care of than beautiful women who you share similar struggles with. But there are times when I’ll just hand out money passing by dancers who I don’t know and don’t even stop to converse with. I also think a part of it is that I’m more worried about their comfortability  with me (like my discussion of my first lap dance). It’s strange that even know this is what they do, strip, I don’t want them to feel like they are obligated to do it. I worry about their own internal reconciliations with it. Irrespective if they have no negative feelings about what they do. I guess by doing that it also allows me to break down their external barriers to a customer and open up. I think it makes them feel a little safer and me a little more genuine. Again, it allows me to connect with them and hopefully learn about their life outside of the club. I no longer do this (nor have I for a long time) in an effort to sleep with them. I sincerely want to hear their stories and know more about them. I suppose in that sense, that I do seek conversation in return.


11) How has COVID-19 changed your life in regards to strippers? Obviously you’re not going currently to the strip clubs. What do you like about it? What do you hate about it?

When COVID-19 just started to take hold and we were not in lockdown I was still hanging out some with my dancer friends. We are now in complete lockdown where I live, and I do not see them. At first, we were all texting a lot. That has since dropped off considerably with nearly all of them. That has made me question the authenticity of these so-called friendships.


As mentioned, I hadn’t been to a strip club in several weeks before COVID-19, so I had already adjusted to it. Before that, I frankly started feeling obligated to go to the club. My dancer friends and bartenders would always text me to see if I was coming down. It is nice not to feel the obligation. It is also nice to step away and reflect on why I do what I do when I go to strip clubs and the validity of the friendships that I supposedly created there. It is nice not to spend all that money!


12) Are you cyber stripping (FaceTime, Skype …)?

No, I didn’t expect them to be nude when I saw them in person at the strip club, so definitely wouldn’t be doing that. However, I do get a lot of nude pics sent to me.


13) How do you feel about the profession of the stripper being erased?

Well the technology for sexual pleasure is most certainly creeping up on the viability of strip clubs. By a vast degree, I think this is unquestionably caused by younger generations. They are growing up technologically advanced and have easy access to porn, cam sites, and social apps and interactions of a sexual nature. Strip clubs seem to be foreign to them and from a different time. Of course, it’s sad for current strippers, but the younger generation is entitled to its own form of sexual gratification.


14) Have dancers easily crossed from stripping to prostitution or do you feel many hold stripper pride (seduction and dance only, no sexual favors in exchange for money?)

I don’t think that has changed one way or another. There are always those dancers who are effectively prostitutes and there are just as many who take much pride in the pure stripper profession. From what I’ve seen, each strip club has a clear identity in who they are and hire the girls that reflect that identity. Certain strip clubs look the other way with customer interactions and have very open policies for their private rooms, while other clubs are very strict with both the girls and the patrons.


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