Often, I wonder what this American saying really means. And then, one day, it fell like scales from my eyes (now that is a German saying) what this could possibly mean, since I do not believe that aging means we lose on value or lose anything.
But here is what I have observed about myself over many years working in the strip club. I tend to choose older customers over the young boys. When I say older, I mean the customer in his late thirties and up. I enjoy conversations with this type much more than with the younger male. I have also noticed, whether married or not, the older customer is usually more respectful and appreciative of women. I have also observed through countless conversations that the average male approaching 40s is not that much afraid of commitment anymore. Au contrary. His existence is more fueled by the fear of being alone in old age. Therefore for he’s more willing to compromise, commit, and relate to a woman. The middle aged man is more willing to put up with even nonsense — that’s why most unhappily married man stay married — to make sure he won’t die alone. He is more willing to be there for a woman and put more effort into multi-tasking and relating, even if it doesn’t make sense to his logical male brain. He’s afraid of what he craved for when he was younger: being independent, free, and not having to care about anything else but his own needs and interests. Therefore the older most men get the more they become what an average, young woman wished and was looking for, her entire life.
However, women are suppose to just get older. What could that possibly mean? Well, most of us spent their life alone whether in a relationship with a man or not. We know a young man’s capability to be there for you is limited, since he cannot multitask and has difficulties expressing his feelings. Therefore most women learn to be independent. By the time they reach their 40s they have built an independent life. Her life is good enough with or without a man. The middle aged woman becomes less interested in compromising and is less tolerant of bullshit. It’s either her way or no way. She is also not interested in sex that much more anymore due to biological changes but also since she’s understood that all the bullshit that comes with sex is often not worth it. He makes a minor mistake and it inconveniences her life she will either punish him (if married) or ditch him. Her life is good enough without a man, she’s used to being alone, she frankly, isn’t that desperate anymore to find “The One.” It’s OK if she doesn’t. She can always get a dog if she doesn’t already have one.
This would mean, that women and men look for the exact opposite at different life stages. And this would explain why dating is so difficult and marriages ends up being just a beneficial organization which helps achieve efficiently the best technical life conditions. But where does this leave love?

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