I have discovered an interesting phenomena in the club, that I logically understand but to be honest, it doesn’t make any sense to me. It appears that when men visit you more frequently and get to know you better, actually, I should rather say, when they think you start liking them a lot, or they create the imagination in their mind that you are falling in love with them, or at least like them a lot, they become more stingy. They think that our “bond” is now based on liking them, and they expect you to entertain them for free, talk to them for hours, listen to them, be their therapist and all without thinking they should reimburse you for your time. Let’s recap this: the better a man gets to know you, the more he likes and falls for you, and the more he thinks you like him the less money he is willing to give you. To me this makes absolutely no sense at all. It should really be the other way around. The more he likes you, the more you talk to him and make his life better and support him the more he should want to make your life better, give freely, spoil you, and help you, support you, make your job easy, cherish your dance on stage, and tip you in the lap dance room. A man should care for you more the more he likes you, yet, he does the opposite!

I have confirmed with my female friends that the same phenomena applies to dating. First, your man will take you out to a 5 star restaurant, spoil you rotten, buy you gifts, take you dancing, to the movies, and surprise you in every way possible to win your heart. Once, he thinks he has won you over a shift happens, the restaurants get simpler and cheaper, till he eventually just wants to watch TV at home and if you are lucky orders in.

To me this is a terrifying and twisted reality, yet, I have to accept it and make sure I don’t like anybody too much except my dogs of course. Call it self-protecting mechanism, having a wall up, being scared by love, fearing real closeness … I call it being an intelligent, educated, up to date, adult woman.

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