We sat together more like friends than like customer and stripper. A very good looking, well educated, young man who had never been to my club before. He said, “You know, this place is cool. The energy is different, you girls are all pretty cool. I like it here. It makes me feel free and not judged.” I said, “It’s probably because all of us girls who work here admit that sexuality is an important part of life and voyeurism part of human nature. We all like to look, but most women don’t admit it. And most women have some shame attached to their sexuality while we own ours and even advertise it.” He said, “Wow, yeah, I have never slept with a woman like that.” I asked, “Can you explain that better?” Him, “Well, most of the girls I have a had sex do things like this,” and he threw his head back flipping his hair around in an unnatural way and started rubbing his chest wildly without any emotion attached. Me surprised, “This is how girls act with you in bed.” Him, “Yes, sometimes I wonder if I even exist and what this is suppose to mean.” I explained, “It looks to me some learned moves from a cheesy porn movie, yet, I think those girls just did what they thought you should do as a woman in order to come across sexy, free, and cool, but when you fake it it’s just imitation sex.” He agreed, “Yes, that’s what it feels like, and let me tell you, it’s no fun at all. It feels uncomfortable.”

I wonder, is this what the adult industry is doing to young women. They think they have to act like the girls in porn. Ugh, that seems to be such an acting job. It must make it impossible to feel yourself while pulling an imitation sex show. And it’s missing the point of what we all crave: true intimacy that goes beyond the physical level.

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