HIDDEN STILETTOS

It was still early into our shift and the club was dead. We were sitting in the dressing room, while the other dancers were drinking at the bar, discussing our family history. And she said to me, “My mother is really proud of me. She thinks it shows much confidence, feminine power, and strength to work as a stripper.” I said, “It can show that. But my patents can never know.” It all depends how your family views the world. I remember years ago my parents visiting me in LA. I didn’t think anything of it, but when my mother discovered my 8 inch stilettos she almost had a heart attack. She yelled at me in Croatian, “You better hide these shoes. If your father sees them he will disinherit you. And for what do you have shoes like this anyways?” Back then, I didn’t work as a stripper yet, and I tried to explain, “I dance in those shoes. Pole dance.” My mother’s face shriveled up, “How can you dance in shoes like this? Nobody can even walk in shoes like this.” I didn’t bother to explain how my shoes made me feel and how much I loved them. I don’t think my mother would’ve understood. I just hid them to make sure my father wouldn’t find them. And of course, my parents couldn’t even understand and tolerate shoes like this, how could they understand that their daughter, who they sent to the most prestigious schools in Germany, started dancing for dollars in shoes like this. We strippers hold many secrets. We have to. To protect the ones we love the most and to protect ourselves. Society isn’t ready for the truth yet. And maybe society will never be ready for the truth.

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Or watch http://vimeo.com/5974973

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