Archive for June, 2013


Posted in Customers with tags , , , , , , , , on June 30, 2013 by tiltdiary

When I step out of the dressing room I see a haggard, skinny man in his 50s lean against the bar watching the stage lewdly. I know right away what he has come for, so I walk up to him, introduce myself to him, and I don’t wait long to pop the question. Now this is a man I will not do a private dance for, however, I can sense he is worth talking to, because he will surely deliver an outrageous enough story worth reporting. So I ask him, “Would you like a private dance?” I can tell he was hoping for me to ask him, but I can also tell he is very cheap (it’s easy to guess this one, because he has not dropped a single dollar to tip any of the dancers who have gone on stage so far). It shoots out of his sloppy mouth like a rusty old bullet out of an outdated rifle, “What do you do in a lap dance?” I act innocently and answer, “Dance.” him again, “I mean, what do I get for my money, I don’t want to waste my money.” It’s always fascinating how well I read humans, and I answer pretending to be stupid, “If you buy a lap dance you get a lap dance, if you buy two lap dances, you get two, and so on.” He must really think I am stupid, “But what do you do during your dance, how does a lap dance work?” I cannot believe how stupid he is while he thinks I am stupid. I know exactly what he wants to hear, because this man didn’t come to the club to watch performers or to get a lap dance. He wants something else, but I say just to fuck with him, “If you don’t know what happens in a lap dance you should really get one.” And with that I walk away.

Later I see he pays PugFace for a private dance. PugFace doesn’t know how to dance on stage nor how to give at least a decent lap dance. Most of the times she pulls a chair in front of the guy and talks to him during her lap dance. But, I think this guy chose the dancer he exactly deserved, and he leaves dissatisfied and will for sure never come back to my club. Which is a good thing. We don’t want cheap and rude guys like him.

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Posted in Jones' wisdom with tags , , , on June 29, 2013 by tiltdiary

This is a story one of my co-strippers recently shared with me. She is a very classy and honest lady, and I think this story should be a lesson for many men.

She had found during a busy night at the club a hat on top of one of the tables with a $100 bill next to it. She took the hat with the $100 bill and started looking for the owner of the hat, to return both, the hat and the $100 bill. The club was packed and she asked many guys, if they had lost their hat. Finally she walked up to a sweaty, fat, fairly drunk guy at the bar and asked once more politely, “Did you loose your hat, sir?” He reached out with his right hand and slapped her hard on her beautiful derriere, and said in a drunken slur, “Yes, babe, that’s my hat.” Her intention was honest and honorable. She really wanted to return the hat and the money to this man, yet, he had only treated her and her effort to find him with disrespect. In order to justify his behavior, she only returned his hat, and frankly, I would have done the same. $100 cannot make up for any physical abuse, but it will make it easier to cope with it.

My co-stripper explained to me, “Later, I saw, this man’s wallet was stuffed with $100 bills. So I knew me punishing him for his rude behavior didn’t hurt him that much, but still made my life a little easier.”

Never touch the body of a woman or slap her derriere without her official permission. It is rude and abusive, and you will be punished one way or the other. I don’t know why men think they can touch us like cattle on the meat market, which I find wrong towards the cattle as well.

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Posted in Jones' wisdom with tags , , , , , on June 28, 2013 by tiltdiary

Does love always come with compromise, pain, and disappointment? Or is the anguish created by us not being able to love unconditionally? Are our expectations too high, and our wishes and visions too unique, so no other human, especially the one we think we love so deeply, can satisfy them? Does love always end in bitterness or indifference? And which of the both self-protecting mechanisms is the worst enemy of love? Both, bitterness and indifference are love’s killer. And is it better to give up on love?

I have no answers to these questions, but I do know, no matter what you say or do, or how you feel about a person, you cannot change how they feel about you. You cannot win or create true love. And you cannot prevent your love from vanishing, once it has been stepped on too many times. Love just is, and although, it’s what we humans long most for, we are completely powerless when it comes to love. Love happens … or doesn’t …

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Posted in Jones' Fantasies with tags , , , , , on June 27, 2013 by tiltdiary

This is me


A fairly grey, seemingly ordinary, little creature

Who no one would even notice

Easily overlooked

But Mouse

Is savvy

And Mouse was chosen

To turn ordinary humans

Into extraordinary believers

Because Mouse was given the gift

To feel what most people will never feel

Mouse at one time in her life

Had all Mouse needs to be happy

Back then, Mouse didn’t crave any change

Nor had Mouse any ambition

Mouse today goes on

Having lost what was most precious to Mouse

Yet, Never taking for granted that Mouse had

What most will never feel

Or experience

Mouse never forgets

And continues to love

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Posted in Jones' wisdom with tags , , , , , , , , , on June 26, 2013 by tiltdiary

We are all seekers in our own ways. Through extensive pain and suffering, I have come finally to the conclusion, that we all seek the same. Some look for it in a strip club, some try to find it by dedicating their life to their children or family, some think they can find it through their work and financial success. Yet most of us stay seekers with unfulfilled desire and hunger that will never be stilled.

We all want to be loved for who we are, we long for a life partner who will love us for who we are are despite our, what we judge, bad sides. Yet, finding this love is not the key to fulfillment and happiness. The latent hunger keeps burning in us. Love without passion is like the ocean without any waves, yet passion will seek more than just love. Passion will seek the creativity for expression, and when we translate this into human relationships then the most creative expression paired with unconditional love will seek sex that will climax in orgasm. But most of us do not have this magical combination.

No matter how successful you are, or how much money you have, no amount of money can buy you this magical combination, in fact, most of us never even get to meet this one person, with whom this magical combination would be possible, because chemistry is vital to create passion. Yet, ironically, the ones that are the chosen ones to meet this person (which happens not often and only once or twice in a life time) where the love, passion, and sex combination would be possible, shy away from it. Overwhelmed and scared by the amount of emotions that are stirred, they choose to turn their back on this person and instead go for a non-passionate version that feels safer … yet the latent hunger returns.

I wonder what will happen, when this hunger, that seems to be impossible to be stilled, goes away, dies inside of us. Would we face death of the soul, meaning the body would live on but what makes us, our true essence would evaporate and just our shell would live on to be indifferent. Or would we achieve pure happiness and bliss? Maybe what the Tibetans monks experience, if they have managed to let go of the latent hunger by starving it to death and suffocating it in discipline. But we don’t know what the Tibetan monks feel. All we experience in our world is what life feels walking around starved and numbing the starvation by drowning it in work, or what we believe we should do, or by substance abuse. There are many ways to cope with the latent hunger, yet, I don’t think we have discovered a way to eliminate it completely, except maybe the Tibetan monks have. But we don’t know that for sure, and we might never know. We might always seek and be starved.

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Posted in Jones' Fantasies with tags , , , , , , , , , on June 25, 2013 by tiltdiary

lomob (2)Don’t think you are safe, don’t think you can hide. Not seeing doesn’t mean you aren’t seen, not wanting to hear doesn’t mean we cannot hear you. Not wanting to admit, hiding in denial, and choosing the easy way out doesn’t mean the storm will miss you. It will get to you when it’s time to hit you. No matter where you hide, no matter how good you lie, no matter what you pretend … just when you feel so safe, as if you cheated life out of justice, just when everything seems so calm and peaceful … that’s when it’s going to hit you, and it’s going to hit you hard because you refused to look up and see the storm clouds gathering. You mistook the warning silence as a sign that all was uncovered and you were safe. Whatever your storm is about to bring, be prepared, look up, open your ears, and stand strong to stand behind your actions instead of hiding behind them. Because before every storm there is silence and no one can escape when it hits.

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Posted in Stripper Secrets with tags , , , , , , , , on June 24, 2013 by tiltdiary

lomob (4)These are my mountains, where I find shelter from the suffocating city, where I can escape to from all the injustice, pain, and loneliness I feel. This is where we go, my pack and me, and this is where everything feels right. These mountains aren’t an escape from reality, they hold their dangers and merciless cycles, but they seems real, honest, with no pretend and no doubt about what life is suppose to be. No matter how many hours I have danced and how few hours of sleep I could catch, my body is never too tired to climb the serpentine paths, and my mind is never too dull to indulge in the beauty of nature. How fortunate am I to have never lost the ability to see real beauty and to feel what really matters in life.

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