Archive for February, 2013

NEVER ENOUGH

Posted in Jones' wisdom with tags , , , , , on February 28, 2013 by tiltdiary

It appears to me that human nature is to create turmoil and drama. I meet so many couples (heterosexual and homosexual) that should be happy, but one in the relationship cannot stop creating misery, and eventually, a harmonious relationship turns sooner than later into a nightmare.

I wonder, if it has to do with the self-fulfilling prophecy, “I am not good enough and do not deserve happiness” what causes one partner to be literally obsessed with the destruction of that happy relationship. Whether they hurt the other partner on a personal level or are unhappy about their life circumstances (job, materialistic wealth, goals and dreams), there is always one bugger in each relationship who will cause damage, often cause the perfect relationship to fail. Can humans not be content and happy? Is the quest for more, better, bigger, or different so imbedded into human nature that there is no way around it?

I don’t know, but all I see is, that whatever human accomplishes and has, is never good enough, and the quest for more and different seems to be making more damage than creating an admirable ambition. Thank God, I have my dogs. They are eternally happy, never nag or complain, and always enjoy even if they just get a little crumb of my plate. They are content and that gives me peace of mind in my world.

Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20

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HOME SWEET HOME

Posted in Jones' Poems with tags , , , , on February 27, 2013 by tiltdiary

Blown away

Snow-covered

Endlessly far

There is my sweet homeland

Dreary and empty

With fading power of recollection

Whatever once connected us

Oh Christmas tree

Oh Childhood Dream

Why are you tearing on my heart

Every light morphs into a face

Why are you waking my agony

Blown away

Snow-Covered

There’s my heart buried somewhere

I try to sleep but always wake

To catch a glimpse of it

Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20

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MERMAIDS AND SAILORS

Posted in Jones' Fantasies with tags , , , , on February 26, 2013 by tiltdiary

IMG371Floating like on a cloud, the gentle foam kissing my tender skin lovingly. Just letting go, surrendering to this experience and diving with every exhale deeper into the waters. As if I would be floating in the ocean, like a mermaid carried by the thick salt water into the arms of my handsome sailor. One detrimental kiss and she will lose her voice, her mind over her broken heart, and eventually her life. But that kiss, so sweet, so tender yet passionate, that moment of bliss was worth dying for. I had kissed my sailor, and he had robbed my soul, oh sweet kiss, how I loved you for as long as you lasted.

Mermaids turn into sea foam, and sailors live on to live a life in slavery. How am I lucky to be a mermaid, free floating on the ocean whether in my mermaid body or as sea foam, it doesn’t matter as long as I am free, fearless, and wild.

Photo by Elle

Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20

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MANY ROADS LEAD TO ROME

Posted in Jones' wisdom with tags , , , on February 25, 2013 by tiltdiary

IMG840The strip club seems to be a safe fantasy world to the customers. They think, whatever happens in the strip club stays in the strip club, and this is for the most part true. However, the men that come to see me do take a permanent impression of me, of Jones, with them when they walk out the door, thinking this was all just play and game. They confess when they come back, “Jones, you got me jonesing, and since I met you, I look at things differently.”

I believe, nothing in life is pure coincidence. I believe, that if you happen to walk into the strip club I happen to work at on those very few night I dance there, and if I grant you my attention, then you are meant to get a dose of Jones. Whether it’s my honestly telling you straight out that you are full of shit trying to convince yourself to believe your own lies about your own life, marriage, career, or whatever else you are trying to pretend to make yourself feel better, or to get you to feel yourself again, the primal self, your desires, dreams, or even to rediscover that you are a man after you’ve tried to hide that fact. You cannot hide from life. You will have to choose a road to walk on, and you will have to follow that road whether you like it or not. But here is the good news: you never know how it would have turned out, if you would have chosen any of the other roads. There is no guarantee another road would have been better, easier, faster. What counts is what you make out of the path you are on.

Always give your best, never turn around (there is no going back), and most importantly have no regrets. Because everything you experienced in your life gives you the power to turn yourself into a better, stronger human being.

Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20

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OUT OF HOPE

Posted in Jones' wisdom with tags , , , on February 24, 2013 by tiltdiary

You feel like all the clouds have opened up over you and the rain is pouring so hard it might wash you away, the lightning is raging around you, the wind is blowing so hard it makes your ears whistle … the storm might feel it’s too much to handle. You feel you lost what you loved the most, you feel there’s nothing left to live for, you feel your heart has hardened into a solid, dark, dirty rock, but it’s still hurting, a fucking bleeding rock inside your chest … you’re crawling, not walking anymore, they have cut you at the knees and then trampled all over you. You think you had enough and this is it, you cannot take it anymore …

But it’s not enough. Lift your head, look up into the sky. See those clouds above you, they will run out of rain, the wind will run out of power, and the lightning’s electricity will burn out sooner than later. Your clothes will dry, your cut knees will heal and soon the crawling will end, and you’ll walk upright again. Taller than ever before. Because it’s going to run out of pain, the sting will go away, and all that pain will turn your weakness into strength. It’s called life, it made me tough, made me who I am, it made Jones, who she is today.

Thank you Strip Club for teaching me about life, about human nature, about men and women, about what really matters. Thank you Strip Club for making me tough, strong like an invincible warrior, teaching me how to speak up and call people on their shit.

Life goes on, no matter what. After every night there is a morning, after every death there is another birth, every tunnel of darkness has to come to an end. Life never ends.

Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20

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HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT

Posted in Jones' wisdom with tags , on February 23, 2013 by tiltdiary

Why are so many women confused whether the man of their desire loves them or not? Women go through so much torment about this one question. I think the answer to this question is very simple. It’s because men avoid as long as possible to make a decision about their feelings. They like to keep all their options open. Often times to a man it’s enough to know he still could be with a woman, yet, it’s much easier to just dream about it then to actually live up to that relationship. We women are often kept warm like a bunch of candy in a basket. They take a handful when they happen to have a sweet tooth. And a lot of women allow this behavior.

Love tolerates a lot, but just because someone allows you to step on them doesn’t mean it’s right for you to do it.

Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20

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MORE TO MAKE YOU TILT

Posted in Media with tags , , , on February 22, 2013 by tiltdiary

Jonesing for more? http://www.amazon.com/dp/1257802860/ref=dra_a_rv_ss_ho_it_P1400_1000?tag=dradis-20

Information about ValenTilt Contest https://tiltdiary.wordpress.com/2013/02/11/valentines-day-contest/

Or Watch http://vimeo.com/59749732